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runwhenisayrunfightwhenisayfight:
If you don’t get this reference, you’re too young for tumblr.
are you fucking kidding me pixar puts out a movie ever year a baby would get this reference
it’s not pixar it’s a reference to that time in 1994 when lamps became sentient humanoids
many were lost that day
It was a grim day for mankind. My parents took refuge in a cave and thus saved us from certain death; we lived close to a lamp factory at the time and the surrounding region was utterly devastated in the conflict.
My brother fought one off using only an egg whisk and a pogo stick.
Only 90s kids remember the Lampocalypse
My father still has the scars from where one stole his kidney
(via tordles)
the best way to a girls heart is punching through the ribcage
apparently this is illegal but dont let it stop you
(via faking-serendipity)
a girl walks into a classroom wearing a spaghetti strap shirt. immediately every boy within a 50 yard radius gets a raging erection. the teacher attempts to present a lesson but to no avail, no one can hear over the sound of every male student masturbating to this girl’s shoulders. why couldn’t she just wear a long sleeved shirt
(via faking-serendipity)
Technically any zoo is a petting zoo if youre not a pussy
(via faking-serendipity)
Blood is thicker than water but maple syrup is thicker than blood so technically pancakes are more important than family.
are you canadian
(via faking-serendipity)
If this gets 3 million notes I’ll make a dress out of these
And wear it to the nearest major city
SIGNAL BOOST AND IF IT GETS TO FOUR MILLION YOU’VE GOT TO MAKE A TIARA THAT MATCHES.
YOU’RE GONNA REGRET PUTTING THIS ON TUMBLR
(via awildtara)
Reblog this if you are literally suprised when people find you attractive.
(via everyredqueen)
i don’t wanna have sex
i want a razor scooter goddammit
liar
look bruh
you can either have sex and feel shitty afterwards
or get the sickest air of your life
the choice is obvious
(via 538rqaeb98gh434398jvgi)
